Uncooked Birthday Cards

Welcome to Uncooked cards, known for their snarky, irreverent copy and sweet illlustrations.

"Our cards are a lot different to other card lines. It'll take time before they get fully appreciated. Smart people get them first. Idiots catch on later, after someone tells them they're funny".

5" x 7" - Coloured envelope - Cello wrapped

View our entire Uncooked Greeting card range

Did you know: You can use the same Uncooked font on our Personalisation page?

birthday - never looked better

Ref: UN025 bd

it's your birthday
and quite honestly,
you've never looked
better. well, obviously
you looked better
a few years ago but
what can you do.

inside: happy birthday

Price: £2.50

Quantity:

birthday - ten years

Ref: UN043 bd

if it makes you feel any
better, you look exactly
like you did ten years ago,
just ten years older.

inside: happy birthday

Price: £2.50

Quantity:

birthday - big deal

Ref: UN045 bd

whatever you do, don't make a
big deal about your birthday
or turning another year older.
i know i'm not going to.

inside text: happy birthday

Price: £2.50

Quantity:

birthday - special birthday things

Ref: UN003 bd

today's your
birthday and
we should
do special
birthday
things like
eat pie
and swear.

inside: happy birthday

Price: £2.50

birthday - within reason

Ref: UN042 bd

i'd do anything to give you
the happiest birthday ever.
within reason of course.
i'm not made of money.

inside: happy birthday

Price: £2.50

Quantity:

birthday - world

Ref: UN040 bd

happy birthday to the
most amazing person in
the world. or maybe
just in this country.
the world is kind of
stretching it.

inside: happy birthday

Price: £2.50

Quantity:

birthday - ruin

Ref: UN001 bd

if someone tried to
ruin your birthday,
i'd ruin their
life.

inside: happy birthday

Price: £2.50

Quantity:

birthday - get to do

Ref: UN005 bd

i hope you have
a great birthday
and get to do all
the fun things
people in jail wish
they could do.

inside: happy birthday

Price: £2.50

Quantity:

birthday - wish for things

Ref: UN008 bd

birthdays are great
because you get to
wish for things like
breast implants and
world peace.

inside: happy birthday

Price: £2.50

Quantity:

birthday - you still can

Ref: UN014 bd

i know you don't like
celebrating birthdays but
at least you still can.
most people your age are
already dead.

inside: happy birthday

Price: £2.50

Quantity:

birthday - but at least

Ref: UN010 bd

i know you hate birthdays
but at least you don't
have a yeast infection.
yeast infections are
the worst.

inside: happy birthday

Price: £2.50

Quantity:

birthday - ruled the world

Ref: UN033 bd

if i ruled the world, i'd make
a rule that said everyone had to
give you a birthday present.
then i'd take all your presents
and leave you for dead.

inside: happy birthday

Price: £2.50

Quantity:

birthday - is just a big

Ref: UN012 bd

anyone who doesn't
wish you a happy
birthday is just
a big lamewad and
i hate them.

inside: happy birthday

Price: £2.50

Quantity:

birthday - stupid birthday

Ref: UN031 bd

i can't wait for your
birthday to be
over so we can start
celebrating the only
birthday that really
matters, mine.

inside: happy birthday

Price: £2.50

Quantity:

birthday - happy idiot

Ref: UN027 bd

i can't stand people who think they're
so cool just because it's their birthday.
that's why i like you. you just act like
a big happy idiot all the time.

inside: happy birthday

Price: £2.50

Quantity:

birthday - popular

Ref: UN039 bd

i can't believe i remembered
your birthday. i've just been
so busy and popular lately,
i'm surprised i remembered
you at all.

inside: happy birthday

Price: £2.50

Quantity:

birthday - dummy

Ref: UN038 bd

if you were in a coma with no
hope of waking up, i'd still buy
you the best birthday present ever.
not that you would be awake to
appreciate it, you big dummy.

inside: happy birthday

Price: £2.50

Quantity:

birthday - younger looking

Ref: UN032 bd

i can't think of anyone who gets
younger looking with age than you.
oh wait, nevermind. i just thought
of someone.

inside: happy birthday

Price: £2.50

Quantity:

birthday - cleavage

Ref: UN028bd

take it from me, don't bother making a
birthday wish. every year i wish
for more cleavage and look at me,
i've got nothing.

inside: happy birthday

Price: £2.50

Quantity:

birthday - diarrhea

Ref: UN030

i'm not going to let anything get in the
way of us celebrating your birthday.
well, unless i get diarrhea. then i won't
be celebrating anything.

inside: happy birthday

Price: £2.50

Quantity:

birthday - nice to you

Ref: UN022 bd

what's great about birthdays
is that for one whole day,
people have to be nice to you.
even the people who think
you're a slut because of
how you dress.

inside: happy birthday

Price: £2.50

Quantity:

birthday - sexy

Ref: UN036 bd

i hope you're ready to have a
sexy birthday because i have all
sorts of sexy things planned.
for example, i'm going to push
your butt cheeks together.

inside: happy birthday

Price: £2.50

Quantity:

birthday - ignore

Ref: UN019 bd

the day after your birthday is the worst
day ever because it's not your birthday
anymore and people go back to ignoring you.
at least that's what happens to me.

inside: happy birthday

Price: £2.50

Quantity:

birthday - lying

Ref: UN034 bd

sometimes i wonder if your birthday
really is when you say it is
or if you're lying, like you do
about your weight

inside: happy birthday

Price: £2.50

Quantity:

belated birthday - gorgeous

Ref: UN041 bd

i'm so mad i forgot your
birthday i can't even look
at myself. oh who am i
kidding, of course i can.
i'm gorgeous.

inside: happy birthday

Price: £2.50

Quantity:

birthday - jerk

Ref: UN35 bd

i would never tell you this,
especially on your birthday,
but when we first met
i thought you were a
real jerk.

inside: happy birthday

Price: £2.50

Quantity:

birthday - skin

Ref: UN020 bd

i'm sure people wouldn't
eat birthday cakes if
birthday cakes tasted
like skin.

inside: happy birthday

Price: £2.50

Quantity:

birthday - burn

Ref: UN015 bd

it makes me so mad to know there
are other people out there who
have the same birthday as you.
so mad i want to burn them alive.

inside: happy birthday

Price: £2.50

Quantity:

Cardoo Birthday Cards

Bald Guy Birthday Cards

You are here :: Cool Cards > Birthday Cards : > Uncooked Birthday Cards

The Cards:

Big Collection :

Birthday Cards :

Valentine Cards :

Other Occasions :

Personalise :

FAQ :

Best Sellers

Uncooked Birthday Cards