Uncooked Birthday Cards

Uncooked Birthday

Available online in the UK exclusively from Cool Cards : A big welcome to New York based Uncooked Cards, off-beat irreverent words, sweet illustrations...

5" x 7" - Colour envelope - Cello wrapped

Did you know: You can use the same Uncooked font on our Personalisation page?

birthday - never looked better

Ref: UN025 bd

it's your birthday
and quite honestly,
you've never looked
better. well, obviously
you looked better
a few years ago but
what can you do.

inside: happy birthday

Price: £2.50

Quantity:

birthday - ruled the world

Ref: UN033 bd

if i ruled the world, i'd make
a rule that said everyone had to
give you a birthday present.
then i'd take all your presents
and leave you for dead.

inside: happy birthday

Price: £2.50

Quantity:

birthday - is just a big

Ref: UN012 bd

anyone who doesn't
wish you a happy
birthday is just
a big lamewad and
i hate them.

inside: happy birthday

Price: £2.50

Quantity:

birthday - stupid birthday

Ref: UN031 bd

i can't wait for your
birthday to be
over so we can start
celebrating the only
birthday that really
matters, mine.

inside: happy birthday

Price: £2.50

Quantity:

birthday - special birthday things

Ref: UN003 bd

today's your
birthday and
we should
do special
birthday
things like
eat pie
and swear.

inside: happy birthday

Price: £2.50

Quantity:

birthday - wish for things

Ref: UN008 bd

birthdays are great
because you get to
wish for things like
breast implants and
world peace.

inside: happy birthday

Price: £2.50

Quantity:

birthday - ruin

Ref: UN001 bd

if someone tried to
ruin your birthday,
i'd ruin their
life.

inside: happy birthday

Price: £2.50

Quantity:

birthday - younger looking

Ref: UN032 bd

i can't think of anyone who gets
younger looking with age than you.
oh wait, nevermind. i just thought
of someone.

inside: happy birthday

Price: £2.50

Quantity:

birthday - but at least

Ref: UN010 bd

i know you hate birthdays
but at least you don't
have a yeast infection.
yeast infections are
the worst.

inside: happy birthday

Price: £2.50

Quantity:

birthday - happy idiot

Ref: UN027 bd

i can't stand people who think they're
so cool just because it's their birthday.
that's why i like you. you just act like
a big happy idiot all the time.

inside: happy birthday

Price: £2.50

Quantity:

birthday - cleavage

Ref: UN028bd

take it from me, don't bother making a
birthday wish. every year i wish
for more cleavage and look at me,
i've got nothing.

inside: happy birthday

Price: £2.50

Quantity:

birthday - ten years

Ref: UN043 bd

if it makes you feel any
better, you look exactly
like you did ten years ago,
just ten years older.

inside: happy birthday

Price: £2.50

Quantity:

birthday - big deal

Ref: UN045 bd

whatever you do, don't make a
big deal about your birthday
or turning another year older.
i know i'm not going to.

inside text: happy birthday

Price: £2.50

Quantity:

birthday - within reason

Ref: UN042 bd

i'd do anything to give you
the happiest birthday ever.
within reason of course.
i'm not made of money.

inside: happy birthday

Price: £2.50

Quantity:

belated birthday - gorgeous

Ref: UN041 bd

i'm so mad i forgot your
birthday i can't even look
at myself. oh who am i
kidding, of course i can.
i'm gorgeous.

inside: happy birthday

Price: £2.50

Quantity:

birthday - dummy

Ref: UN038 bd

if you were in a coma with no
hope of waking up, i'd still buy
you the best birthday present ever.
not that you would be awake to
appreciate it, you big dummy.

inside: happy birthday

Price: £2.50

Quantity:

birthday - lying

Ref: UN034 bd

sometimes i wonder if your birthday
really is when you say it is
or if you're lying, like you do
about your weight

inside: happy birthday

Price: £2.50

Quantity:

birthday - get to do

Ref: UN005 bd

i hope you have
a great birthday
and get to do all
the fun things
people in jail wish
they could do.

inside: happy birthday

Price: £2.50

Quantity:

birthday - you still can

Ref: UN014 bd

i know you don't like
celebrating birthdays but
at least you still can.
most people your age are
already dead.

inside: happy birthday

Price: £2.50

Quantity:

birthday - ignore

Ref: UN019 bd

the day after your birthday is the worst
day ever because it's not your birthday
anymore and people go back to ignoring you.
at least that's what happens to me.

inside: happy birthday

Price: £2.50

Quantity:

birthday - sexy

Ref: UN036 bd

i hope you're ready to have a
sexy birthday because i have all
sorts of sexy things planned.
for example, i'm going to push
your butt cheeks together.

inside: happy birthday

Price: £2.50

Quantity:

birthday - jerk

Ref: UN35 bd

i would never tell you this,
especially on your birthday,
but when we first met
i thought you were a
real jerk.

inside: happy birthday

Price: £2.50

Quantity:

love - 9

Ref: UN001 love

on a scale of
1 - 10 you're a
9. not because
you're not a
10 but because
9 rhymes with
mine which is
what you are

Price: £2.50

Quantity:

love - tiny pink

Ref: UN023 love

i'm so glad i have real arms and
not those tiny pink plastic ones.
this way i can hug you real tight
and not have to worry about
them popping off.

Price: £2.50

Quantity:

love - you're so cute

Ref: UN010 love

you're so cute i
want to yank off
your head, stick it
in a jar and keep
it next to my
computer.

Price: £2.50

Quantity:

birthday - best friend award

Ref: UN005 friend

if there was an award for
the best friend in the world,
i'd make sure you'd get it.
even if it meant having
unprotected sex with
the judges.

inside: blank
Price: £2.50

Quantity:

birthday - balm

Ref: UN003 - friend

the best part about
having you as a friend
is that i can borrow
your lip balm and not
worry about getting
herpes.

inside: blank
Price: £2.50

Quantity:

birthday - burn

Ref: UN015 bd

it makes me so mad to know there
are other people out there who
have the same birthday as you.
so mad i want to burn them alive.

inside: happy birthday

Price: £2.50

Quantity:

Uncooked Love Cards

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Uncooked Birthday Cards

Uncooked Birthday

birthday - never looked better

birthday - ruled the world

birthday - is just a big

birthday - stupid birthday

birthday - special birthday things

birthday - wish for things

birthday - ruin

birthday - younger looking

birthday - but at least

birthday - happy idiot

birthday - cleavage

birthday - ten years

birthday - big deal

birthday - within reason

belated birthday - gorgeous

birthday - dummy

birthday - lying

birthday - get to do

birthday - you still can

birthday - ignore

birthday - sexy

birthday - jerk

love - 9

love - tiny pink

love - you're so cute

birthday - best friend award

birthday - balm

birthday - burn

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