Jesus & Mo Cards


The Cast

The Cast

 

We ask the Author:

What is Jesus & Mo?
Since 2005 it’s been a comic strip dealing in religious satire.

Is that really the Prophet Mohammed?
No, it’s a body double. Mohammed couldn’t make it, as he has been dead for centuries.

Is that really Jesus?
Yes, that is really Jesus. I don’t know how he does it, but he always finds time in his busy schedule to appear in the comic whenever someone loads a J&M page in their browser.

Is that really Moses?
Enough already.

Why is the Barmaid never drawn?
It is forbidden. Plus, I can’t draw barmaids.

Can I see more comic strips of Jesus & Mo?
Yes you can. Many more at the fabulous Jesus & Mo website
And you can also buy Jesus & Mo books
Not to mention Jesus & Mo T-shirts, mugs and more
 

Jesus & Mo Cards

Jesus & Mo Cards

14.5cm x 14.5cm - white envelope - cello wrapped

We creatively use the the Jesus and Mo comic strip Font to enhance your (optionally) personalised greeting card message... We like to think that's what Jesus would do.
 



Personalised Greetings Cards



Inside: (All can be additionally personalised)
Blank  
Happy birthday from Jesus & Mo  
Happy birthday from the Barmaid  

Flying Spaghetti Monster

Ref: JM32



Yes, Mo - Some people DO take the Flying Spaghetti Monster seriously. They claim to have been "Touched by his noodly appendage"

Fools! The deity is clearly fictional, the Holy Book is written by a human. The post-death paradise is designed to appeal to man's basest instincts

The central tenets are either patently self-serving, or arbitrary and weird - and there's not a shred of evidence for its existence

Some people will believe anything

You're telling me!

Price: 2.25



Quantity:


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Inside: (All can be additionally personalised)
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Happy birthday from Jesus & Mo  
Happy birthday from the Barmaid  

Fraud

Ref: JM31



She said Christianity was fundamentally absurd. It was quite hurtful!

Well, the barmaid has a right to say these things. It's called freedom of speech.

Then she moved onto the book of Mormon.

Ha Ha! It is a terrible book, isn't it? Those Mormons, Ha Ha Ha!

In an open society, people who believe such nonsense need to have a thick skin.

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Price: 2.25



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Inside: (All can be additionally personalised)
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Happy birthday from Jesus & Mo  
Happy birthday from the Barmaid  

Anti

Ref: JM30



Hi, I'm Jesus

And I'm Mo

And together we're... Jesus and Mo

What are you going to do for us tonight, Jesus and Mo?

Tonight we're going to confiscate your stuff, threaten to physically remove you from the building, surround you with security guards, follow you around wherever you go, and generally humiliate you

But why?

Because we're anti-harassment


Price: 2.25



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Happy birthday from Jesus & Mo  
Happy birthday from the Barmaid  

South Park

Ref: JM024



Hey Barmaid. Did you hear South Park are
planning an episode making fun of Atheism?

It's about time - They've already
made fun of everyone else


Yes, I heard. Apparently the Atheist community
is really upset, and Atheist leaders are demanding
that the show be cancelled

Some Atheist Fundamentalists are so offended
that they have made death threats

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Price: 2.25



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Happy birthday from Jesus & Mo  
Happy birthday from the Barmaid  

'spect

Ref: JM022



What you want
Baby I got it
What you need
You know I got it
All I'm askin'
Is for a little respect from you


Oo, your cartoons ain't so funny
They hurt the tender hearts
Of Shia and Sunni


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Price: 2.25



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Rocks

Ref: JM023



The Onion has a satirical cartoon
which blasphemes all the major
religions except Islam!


By pointedly failing to include me
in their blasphemous montage,
they are suggesting that my followers
are easily provoked into indiscriminate violence


It is Islamophobia in a very literal sense.
Why can't they just leave us alone?


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Price: 2.25



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Must

Ref: JM026



OK, Barmaid. One more time.
It's really not that complicated.


Everything that has a beginning must have a cause

MM..

The Universe has a beginning,
so it must have a cause


Therefore...?

Therefore no bacon

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Price: 2.25



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Nazi

Ref: JM025



The Pope is the victim of a
militant Atheist hate campaign

Yeah, what are you hysterical
secularists demonizing him for?


Well, there's the Church's continued discrimination
against women and homosexuals
Then there's its life-endangering stance against
contraception and stem-cell research

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Price: 2.25



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Edge

Ref: JM028



Science is fine as far as it goes,
but it cannot answer the big questions
such as "Why are we here?"
"What is the purpose of beauty?"

"Who created the laws of physics and logic?"

These are questions for theologians to answer

Do theologians really have answers to these questions?
I thought they just made answers up

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Price: 2.25



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More

Ref: JM027



OK, one more time...
AIDS causes the deaths of millions.
The use of condoms could reduce that number
significantly, but the Church is against that?


Yes

And IVF technology has helped
millions of infertile couples experience
parenthood, with approximately four million
individuals brought into the world as a result


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Price: 2.25



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Women

Ref: JM021



I don't understand the Christian
pro-life postition. In EX 21.22 it
clearly says that if a man causes a
woman to miscarry, he should be
fined - not executed, for which is the
biblical punishment for murder


Yeah, but it's still taking a life

Not if you use the Biblical definition
of life, which is breath - like when God
breathed life into Adam in GEN 2:7


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Price: 2.25



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Happy birthday from the Barmaid  

Abuse

Ref: JM029



This is outrageous. Those militant Atheists
are targetting school children now!

Bastards! Let them try

Are they so desperate to stamp out faith
that they would resort to indoctrinating
innocent young minds?

Fear not! Their shallow, godless ideology
is no match for True Religion


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Price: 2.25



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Ball

Ref: JM006



So, Mo. What's all this furore about people drawing cartoons of you in Denmark?

It is perfectly understandable.

I am a role model to millions, who regard me as the perfect example of manhood.

Any portrayal of me must surely fall short of that perfection.

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Price: 2.25



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Sense

Ref: JM002



Barmaid, if you don't believe in God, why do you bother being good?

Yes, why don't you go around behaving in a selfish and criminally irresponsible manner?

Are you saying that the only reason you boys don't steal, murder or rape is because you desire the approval of a supernatural being?

Yes.

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Them

Ref: JM018



By "othering" us, they are seeking to define for themselves an identity based on difference.

While at the same time bolstering their own sense of moral and cultural superiority. Sometimes they can go so far as to demonize or dehumanize "the other" - And from there it is a small step to the justification of violence.

Don't you do that, too?

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Price: 2.25



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Happy birthday from the Barmaid  

Birth

Ref: JM007



There is only one solution to the problem of teenage pregnancy - abstinence.

Teaching kids about contraception only encourages them to have sex, and it doesn't always work, anyway.

Who can deny that abstinence is the only 100% effective method of birth control?

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Price: 2.25



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Atoms

Ref: JM004



Sometimes, when I look at the night sky, I am overwhelmed by a sense of our insignificance.

Are we really the byproduct of an evolutionary algorithm, living briefly and precariously on a tiny speck in some corner of the cosmos?

Little candles of consciousness destined, like the star that birthed us, to burn out, leaving only atoms and memories...

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Price: 2.25



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Piety

Ref: JM013



I've got a great tactic to use against the Barmaid's attacks on our religions - Take offence at every opportunity.

Taking offence puts your opponent on the defensive because they'll think they've overstepped some mark.

And if you take offence often and loudly enough, people will be reluctant to say anything critical about your dearly held beliefs.

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Price: 2.25



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Lewd

Ref: JM001



Did you see the look that jogger just gave me?
It was pretty lewd, wasn't it?

Lewd? I have never been leered at so brazenly in my life
And that wink was positively lascivious!


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Price: 2.25



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Happy birthday from the Barmaid  

Fifty

Ref: JM011



Hey Mo, do you want to make $50,000?

There's a guy on the Internet who uses Islamic texts to demonstrate that you are a paedophile, a narcissist...

...a misogynist, a rapist, a lecher, a torturer, a mass murderer, a cult leader...

...an assassin, a terrorist and a looter.

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Price: 2.25



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Happy birthday from Jesus & Mo  
Happy birthday from the Barmaid  

Proud

Ref: JM015



Barmaid, why aren't you a believer? Is it because you are wedded to a life of sin?

No.

Are you too proud to submit to the will of Allah?

No.

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Price: 2.25



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Happy birthday from Jesus & Mo  
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Apes

Ref: JM003



We are not animals, Barmaid.

If humans decended from apes, why are there still apes?

We didn't evolve from modern apes. We share a common ancestor with them.

Answer the question!

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Price: 2.25



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Happy birthday from Jesus & Mo  
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Both

Ref: JM008



Hi, I'm Jesus.

And I'm Mo.

And together we're... Jesus and Mo.

What are you going to do for us tonight, Jesus and Mo?

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Price: 2.25



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Crude

Ref: JM010



Barmaid, your critique of theism is too crude.

Yeah, it's easy to attack people who believe in a literal infinite, omniscient, beneficent, immortal deity.

Sophisticated believers are different.

People who are mature in their faith know that God is a metaphor.

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Price: 2.25



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Happy birthday from Jesus & Mo  
Happy birthday from the Barmaid  

Gift

Ref: JM012



Yes, science is a wonderous gift.

But religion sure is, too.

So don't let them atheists make you chose between the two.

They'll tell you faith is a disease, an affront to common sense,
a collection of hypotheses of rectal provenance.

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Price: 2.25



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True

Ref: JM019



I see Hindu extremists have closed down an art exhibition because it had paintings of a couple of Hindu goddesses in the nude.

Hindu goddesses in the nude? Aren't they always?

What I don't understand is how the Hindus know the paintings are of their goddesses.

What? As oppposed to any old imaginary blue female? Yes I see what you mean!

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Price: 2.25



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Close

Ref: JM009



So, if we can conceive of a supremely perfect being, it must exist because..?

Because existence is a property of perfection - If it doesn't exist, it's not perfect.

I like it! Do you think we can apply the ontological argument to other things? A perfect pint of Guinness, for example?

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Price: 2.25



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Slack

Ref: JM016



You cannot outlaw circumcision. It is a religious requirement - An essential part of our identity.

It's not as if we want to impose the practice on others.

Apart from your babies, you mean?

Ask yourself this: What kind of state would impose such a draconian prohibition?

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Stood

Ref: JM017



So I asked her why the new atheists were so militantly anti-religion.

What is it that drives them to ever more aggressive denunciations?

Why the need to silence, to destroy?

Could it be that the mere existence of people of faith poses a threat to their atheistic certainties?

What did she say?

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Price: 2.25



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Inside: (All can be additionally personalised)
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Happy birthday from Jesus & Mo  
Happy birthday from the Barmaid  

Away

Ref: JM005



Hi, I'm Jesus.

And I'm Mo.

And together we're... Jesus and Mo.

What are you going to do for us tonight, Jesus and Mo?

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Price: 2.25



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Happy birthday from the Barmaid  

Verse

Ref: JM020



It is very easy for Islamophobes to quote the Koran out of context.

They never quote verse 5.32, where it says Whoever kills a human being, it is as if he has killed all mankind.

What about the very next verse, 5.33, where it says Those who make war against Allah should be murdered or crucified, or have their hands and feet chopped off?

Now you're over-contextualizing.






Price: 2.25



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Speck

Ref: JM014



We prefer the possibility of false belief to no belief at all.

Because with God, our lives have meaning and purpose.

Whereas without God, we are reduced to being no more than a tiny speck.

In a vast universe









Price: 2.25



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Bespoke: Jesus & Mo Cards

Bespoke: Jesus & Mo Cards

Sorry, we can't feature all of the Jesus & Mo strips here what with there being an (almost) infinite number of them... But if you have a favourite strip you'd like us to print, just let us know and we'll create it, just for you.

email: Jesus & Mo at Cool Cards


 

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